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right and wrong

2009-06-09T21:06:00.005+08:00

Well I have been fighting this - in my mind of course, about what's right and what's wrong. I think most people do too, with exception those perverts we read in newspaper raping and molesting their own children, sisters, brothers, grandchildren and all. My perception is that if they have done that, then they must have no conscience, therefore they don't even qualify to be a thinker of right and wrong.

So where does this right and wrong come from? From the day we begin to apprehend what's being said to us, probably circa 2 years old, we were being told what's good, what's bad, what's right and what's wrong. The values that our parents or guardians instill in us are the good ones - talk nicely, speak the truth, don't lie, be a giver more than a taker, don't steal etc.

As we grow older, we could consciously differ the good and bad, right and wrong but to err is just human, as they say. One time or another, we do lose our fight to be good, to be right. Most of the time we do good and right because there are people looking. I ask myself, would I do this good thing if no one's looking? In my younger days, I would probably have chosen a wrong due to lack of understanding or just to rebel - that I did not do much, I think :-]

As I got to more birthdays and see my children grow, I think, I have made wiser decisions and make more effort to do good and right. As my mother once told me, hmm, actually quite a few times, ok, many times, to be bad is simple but to be good takes a lot of effort. Now I see that is so damned right. There's been so many times that I have to fight the demons in my head and those hanging on my back before I can really do a right. It is just too easy to do wrong, and it just makes you feel good doing bad, ecstacy some say. But hey, you want to feel better? Try fight those whispering demons and do good. Better still, do it when no one's around.

I have much to say on the matter, way too many examples to be given but as they say (who are they anyway..) don't bore others trying to be too good. Is there such a thing as being too good, too right? When they want to feel good, they want to feel real good, not half good, not a bit good but when it comes to being good, there's too good? Goody two-shoes? Hahaha... So they're saying just be a goody one-shoe? How about baddy no-shoes? :-]

Think about that, I am going to continue this a bit more later... with examples of those people I hate most. Oh damn... excuse me for that, my mother always reminded me not to hate others... yes but these are people many of us love to hate. Yeay... soon.

Cheers and chill out babbbehhh... life's too short.

Wife

2009-05-27T00:28:00.000+08:00

Wife... a woman married to man. She who sacrifices her youth, energy and life to the man and children. A simple sentence describes the wife but how do we actually see them? Do we appreciate them?

My fourteenth wedding anniversary is coming up in a couple of days. What has my wife given me and my children over the years? Let's see... a normal weekday would start with her getting up to the ring of the alarm clock at 5.30 am. Most of the time she will be the one up first as I very seldom hear the rings when in deep slumber. She will wake me up, more often not once as I'm really not easy to rise. When I finally put my feet on the floor, she had usually woken the kids and she'd be making breakfast. She will make sure the kids get ready on time to catch their bus to school. Before taking her bath, she hand-washes the whites and clothes which are not tees. She says the washing machine does not clean as well as hand-wash and she makes sure the whites stay white. By 7.45 am, I would have gotten ready, had my breakfast and leaving for work while she would be hanging those clothes, hand-washed and from the washing machine, to dry out in the sun.

She leaves for office with her sister around 8.30am and arrives back home around 6.30pm. My kids dread her entering the house as that's when she'll see many things not to her liking. Kids being kids, they will leave school bags, books, shoes, socks, colour pencils, papers, crumbs about the house and she will call out to each to clean up. Almost always, the next thing she will be holding will be the broom and scoop. Yes, she's a clean freak - that's what I tell her - and she will retort that if it's not her, who else will do it? By this time, I would sneak away to find something to do or else... hahaha.

After sweeping almost the whole house, she gets the dinner table ready and cleans up after. She checks the kids' homework. She irons everyone's clothes for the next day while watching TV, by which time she's done would be about 10pm and time for the kids to sleep. She would normally watch a bit of TV or read a bit before hitting the sack. Ughhh... I feel tired just writing about it.

On weekends, she airs pillows under the sun, change bed sheets, wash clothes, sweep, mop, dust and even bake muffins, cake or puffs for tea. Karen White had a hit song in the 80s 'I'm not your superwoman' which about says what she's not but did I marry one? I could not fathom what I would do without my wife... The thing I hate most to do is ironing and that I have told her before we got married that I hope she would do that for me. I don't mind doing the dishes, that's my favourite chore, I'm pretty much OK with anything but ironing. She agreed, pheww... but still I would offer to do it if she was sick or tired.

How did she do it? Does she take steroids behind my back? It is easy to write the chores that the wife does but it's a different matter to actually be doing them. If I had to do what she does in a day, I don't think I could even do half of those. For you dudes who could afford a maid or two to do the cooking, cleaning, washing, ironing etc, you may not even care if your maid's tired - they are paid to do that. But for your loved one, other half, intan payung to do everything? The least you could do is to appreciate her.

I LOVE MY WIFE!!!
Honey, thanks for everything you did for me and the kids for the past 14 years and the coming days. I really, really, reaaaaaaaaaaallllly love you. Mmmmmuaahh!!

a little respect please....

2009-05-04T22:39:00.000+08:00

Respect... that is a huge word. For this post, I am not interested in its long interpretation, just a part of it and in the context of a Malaysian in Malaysia. This is wehere I am from and where I will be for the rest of my life unless there's greener pastures elsewhere... hehehe. But really, I am a Malaysian and proud of it.

The message about respect I am going to touch is the respect of other people's culture. There's a Malay saying, "Masuk kandang kambing, kita mengembek. Masuk kandang harimau, kita mengaum". Well, not exact to it's word but the message is when you are in a community, you should adjust yourself to the culture around you.

Most of us are more understanding of our own culture and quite alien to the lifestyle of others. To learn about another culture requires first and foremost, respect. We have to respect what we see, however out of this world it is, of what other people do in their livesand how they live it. To be invited, especially to a ceremonial function of another culture, is an honour bestowed to us, thus proper respect is to be displayed. Displayed as in properly attired and well, maybe facial expressions and words that come out of our mouth, the volume included.

Pardon me if anyone has been guilty of this matter I am about to mention. Example, a Malay wedding, invitation extended to non-Malays. To respect a Malay wedding is not to come with a big present, in shorts displaying curly hairy legs. Sure there are Malays who wear shorts everywhere but definitely not to a proper ceremony. If you are a non-Malay, men, you are not expected to wear a Baju Melayu, so at least wear long pants and a nice shirt. Ladies, Malay weddings are not parties to be bouncing off your assets or showing those strings between the cracks. So safe them for more appreciative viewers - go to the government offices where people wait staring at the ceiling. They'll have reason to look down now.

Another story, my office is one of multi-racial mix and some time back a Malay colleague's parent passed away. One of the Chinese ladies in the office would like to visit but said she can only visit the next day because she is wearing a skirt and she thought it is not proper or even disrespectful to the family of the deceased to be there attired such. She was not sure but at least she was thoughtful and clearly made sure 'respect' was utmost when paying the last respect. Now she really got herself way up in my books of highly regarded people in the office.

I have a couple of times when I was younger and more energetic, followed the Chingay procession and I made sure that I don't make comments that may hurt the people I was with even though I was very much expected to be ignorant. To show respect is to understand and understanding don't come without learning.

I just hope I have brought light to some who was in the dark before.

Me a bad driver? ...or are you?

2009-04-27T22:19:00.000+08:00

Yesterday I was driving to visit a friend whose wife had given birth recently when I came to a T junction at which my direction would be turning right. There were quite a number of cars from both directions, so I had to wait a bit before I could make my turn. After about 2 minutes, my chance was there. There was no traffic from my left, while on the right the last car just passed with the next one being about fifty metres away and driving casually. As my car moved, the bloody guy flashed his lights and accelerated! By this time I was midway of making through, he was coming at me like a bull charging, with no intent of slowing down. I stepped on the gas and passed through by inches and he was honking away. What a hassle it would have been if he had hit my car! It would not have been too difficult for him to just continue cruising and let me pass. Watch out... there are some crazy and selfish people in this world.

This morning I was driving casually to work, the car in front of me was about 10 metres away when we were approaching a crossroad. We were on the main road and had right to pass. At the crossroad I saw a lady driver waiting to cross. The next car behind me was about 80m metres away. Just as the car in front passed her, the lady suddenly drove in front of me through the 10-metre gap! Damn... where had that lady learnt driving! I could not fathom why she chose to so as she could have just waited 3 seconds and passed comfortably after me. I was almost standing on my brake lever and thought my eyes could have popped out its socket if I had not worn glasses. Even if she was rushing on a matter of life and death, having a death wish like that was not justifiable. Selfish or stupid? Only she can answer that.

Two days and two near misses! I just hope people would be more relaxed when driving and not try to become or invite the Angel of Death.

Ohh... by the way, here's something I got off my mailbox. It's a good method of adjusting your car's side mirror. It will help as long as you are not the crazy or selfish driver like those I encountered.

Safe Driving Aid - Side Mirrors Adjustment

Excerpts from National Safety Council on Safe Driving.

Some of the most serious preventable accidents occur because of blind spots while driving! Now there is a remarkable simple solution discovered by an engineer named George Platter. He presented his method at the prestigious Society of Automotive Engineers. The National Safety Council tested his theory and discovered, to their amazement, that it works! The method has been fully endorsed by the National Safety Council as described in their September/October issue of Traffic Safety.

Here's how it works. First, forget how we learned to adjust our outside mirrors by plopping behind the steering wheel and turning the mirrors so that we just saw the side of our car looking back at us in the mirrors. Instead, adjust the driver's side mirror by resting your head against the driver's side window and then turning the mirror so that you just see the side of your car. Once this is set, move to the center of the vehicle and turn the passenger side mirror so that you can just see the side of your car from the center of the vehicle.

That's it. You won't see your own car in either mirror, yet what you will see is far better. Cars behind you show up as usual in the inside rear-view mirror above the dash, but the instant the car leaves your field of vision from the rear-view mirror the outside mirror picks it up. No blind spot; no delays; no wondering where that car about to pass you has disappeared to, and no waiting a few seconds for the car that you just saw in your rear-view mirror to show up in your outside mirrors. All three mirrors work in harmony with one another, and the blind spot has been eliminated!

Bernice Schira

Learning Resource Center

Vermilion Campus

(403) 853-8460

bernice.schira@lakelandc.ab.ca

http://www.lakelandc.ab.ca/

blogger now

2009-04-26T14:43:00.000+08:00

Hi there... OK, so now I'm officially a blogger instead of just a blogee? Ahh... after much reading of others' blog, finally I am here. How long will I last? Hmm... I hope to put my thoughts here... which for a long time have only been conveyed by mouth to a good friend of mine, who by the way became a proud father again at age 42 of a 3.3 kg baby girl today, his 3rd and same gender all. Congrats dude. Hope your good wife and newborn are in good health and will be your joy in your days to come.

So this friend, let's call him Taring like I call him (not his real name though), had not been expecting a baby at this age. He had thought his diapering days were over some good 10 years ago but hey, those little tadpoles been swimming far. I guess he's been ready for the past few months, psyching himself up for this day and chores coming with the new addition. Taring, he's a good guy. He is, really, though he may not look so and some muggers look better, hahaha. Someday, after what 's being said here, if I manage to get his permission, I'll post his best looking pix.

So, wow... by first blogger day. I'll just some of the things I plan to write to another day. Then there'll be more entries and I won't be a 'one-bit-wonder'...

I'll leave now with a bug's pix which made way into my back-tv-room (I'll have something to say about this room too, later...)

I'll scoot away now, have a great day... cheers.